I attended a kids birthday party for someone in my son’s pre-kindergarten class. At a trampoline park, it was every bit the chaos you would expect with 20 five years old running around and literally bouncing off the walls.

The host mom started to coyly pass out drinks to the parents amidst the chaos. It looked like orange juice but she was giving winks and head nods that this was just for the moms and dads. …

Honestly I’m just tired of all of it.

I’m tired of the shelter in place, of homeschooling, of worrying about the next grocery run.

I’m tired of freaking out over a sudden sneeze, over money, and when my kids use too much toilet paper.

I’m tired of the politicizing of this pandemic. The rage. The greed. Seeing people at their absolute worst.

And when I drive to an essential chore, I’m tired of judging and feeling furious when I see people doing things I have personally deemed not essential. Angry that they seemingly believe they are above the rest of…

It’s the paradox of modern motherhood: “Go back to work 6-8 weeks after having the baby... Also, breastfeed for at least a year... Also, lose that baby weight…”

I think every mom can nod their head in agreement: being a mom in 2020 is not just hard, it’s relentless. And with self-quarantine on top if it all, now we add homeschooling to the mix. But stay off screens. Teach your kids but don’t forget your career.

There are so many mixed messages between putting family first but also practicing self-care, professional growth and breaking through the glass ceiling. Don’t forget…

Look, I get it. Addiction and recovery are not “cool”. They will never be trending on social media. No one ever aspires to be the chick who writes about addiction and recovery (true story).

People equate addiction to a bad thing… it’s the opposite of what we want for anyone. It’s a sad sad outcome to years of self abuse, or genetics, or childhood trauma or however you want to approach it.

I was 23 when we met. Young and naive, I fell fast for the techie with a fancy car and a job that required clothes to be regularly dry cleaned. He boasted about already having college savings started for his future kids. He bought his mom (and soon my mom) fancy bouquets on Mothers Day. He took me to the nicest restaurants, and the boutique hotels for weekend getaways.

Yes, he had faults. I remember telling him early on I was concerned he drank too much. Having a father who was an alcoholic, I was turned off by the daily…

This weekend I went to a wedding at a friend’s house. As we chatted with fellow guests, my partner and I stood in line at the bar.

“What can I get you?” the bartender smiled. “We have everything!”

“Great!” I cheered. I was thirsty. “Something non-alcoholic please.”

The bartender’s cheery demeanor immediately turned to one of perplexity. He wasn’t expecting this, apparently. Befuddled by my request, he told me there was juice and water bottles in the cooler around the corner. So… the kids cooler.

Yea, I know the drill. I’ve been sober almost two years and I know all…

These middle years of life are hard.

We are done having kids and are now focused on shaping and nurturing and growing these little humans.

Part of the middle years means more trips to the doctor, more false alarms, more chances of something serious.

The stress of nursing and changing diapers and baby proofing everything has made way to helping our kids acclimate at school, avoid bullies and eat their veggies. We try to limit McDonalds trips. Screen time becomes a necessary evil. It’s a constant dance of power struggles, growth and nurturing, and trying to let them just be kids.

Our own parents and our friends’ parents health begins to wane. The people who gave us life are…

From the moment I got pregnant with my first child, it’s been a battle. A war. With my work, with my family, with my schedule, with societal expectations. And above all, with myself.

I knew it would be hard to hold a job and raise kids, but I learned early on that it would be harder than I ever imagined.

First, unpaid maternity leave. Six weeks unpaid leave to get my maternal bearings and lean the-f*ck back in.

I came back to work with a breast pump and hemorrhoids to boot. At the time, I felt ready. …

“I knew I was coming down with something, because I felt strange.”

My friend said it so passively, I almost missed it.

She was referring to a flu that smacked her off her feet a few hours later, but it gave me pause for another reason.

For many, many years, I couldn’t trust my body with feelings, knee jerk reactions, and with physical changes. Because for me, I was never sure how much of it was coming from me, and how much was coming from last night’s bottle of wine.

My body feeling weird? That was generally me just hungover…

Ahh, the second trimester. This is the stuff pregnancy dreams are made of. You feel good, your belly is adorable, and you are feeling the pop pop pop of little kicks from your baby who Baby Center says is currently the size of a spaghetti squash!

The second trimester begs the question everyone’s thinking — Is she fat or just pregnant?

At first I wasn’t going to write this post. Why bitch about such a magical time? But there are a few things at this stage in the pregnancy game that no one talks about, and they’re important! So let’s just delve right in.

Loneliness. It’s lonely being pregnant. No one can share the joyous…

Celeste Yvonne

Some days I write for big publications, other days I just try to keep the kids alive. And on all days I focus on staying sober. https://bit.ly/2S3GbJX

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